#and taking the time to get Into It
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bookwyrminspiration · 1 year ago
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god I would be UNSTOPPABLE if I was capable of consistently initiating tasks. just you wait. you'll be waiting a while but just you wait
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shadesofmauve · 22 days ago
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I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.
Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.
He was really nice.
Yeah.
It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?
You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."
You didn't, loves, you didn't.
We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.
I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.
Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.
When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"
No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.
Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?
Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.
That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.
I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.
A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.
I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.
So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!
Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.
You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.
I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.
I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.
It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.
Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 10 months ago
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Expertise can't help you here.
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nariarts · 6 months ago
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Spent a ridiculous amount of time last night obsessively editing my hand written zines in Photoshop to take away any tiny blemishes so they were definitely readable.
Whatever. Understand or don't.
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carsonjonesfiance · 11 days ago
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“This thing is legally dubious and therefore technically unenforceable.” Is not a “useless liberal gotcha” it’s how legalism works in this country. Tying up stupidly worded EOs in court is the quickest way to keep them from being implemented. It is the definition of “doing something.” But it doesn’t usually involve much tweeting so of course a certain type of leftist feels obligated to mock it.
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soapbbox · 20 days ago
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A Quintesson attack leaves Megatron in need of repairs.
Let’s pretend this takes place early where Megatron isn’t incredibly paranoid about back stabbing (Starscream) yet
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gongyussy · 5 months ago
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(✿◕‿◕) die (ꈍ ꒳ ꈍ✿)
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birdmenmanga · 3 months ago
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they are putting yaoi in the city art museum and censoring nsfw content with heat-responsive material so you have to put your hands on it to see dick
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war-forged-storms · 5 months ago
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I know that some people get very nervous around the idea of having sex while under the influence, but don’t worry, I’ll guide you.
You can come sit on my lap and I’ll hold your cup or can or whatever and help you drink it down, all while my other hand feels you over your underwear. We’ll go nice and slow, I won’t slip my fingers into them until you whisper in a drawl that you want it. If you really struggle with it, I can take the sip of your drink or take the shot for you and spit it into your mouth through a kiss. That way there’s less thinking work for you.
You can take an edible or something and I’ll slowly start to go down on you while you’re in a nice and hazey. If you’re comfortable with smoking, maybe I’d let you take a few hits off my joint, or again I can shotgun them to you, make even getting stoned something out of your responsibility. Just lay down and let me make you feel good.
I’ll tell you everything I’m doing and everything I’m going to do. I’ll make sure you’re as comfortable and care free as you can be while I work orgasm after orgasm out of you when you’re in your own little world.
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kedreeva · 1 year ago
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There's some dude (derogatory) on FB who is PISSED people are pricing their farm fresh eggs at $2 and $3 a dozen instead of $4+, saying it's "disrespectful" and "undignified" and "I'm trying to feed my kids" like Sir, you are on a Facebook group page bitching about your neighbors egg prices because your pet chickens aren't earning you a living wage and you think it's your neighbors' fault, you do not have a leg to stand on here wrt dignity.
Also half the answers are like "I give them to friends and family free" or "I donate them to food banks" or "I'm making them affordable to folks who might not otherwise be able to get them now that they're so expensive in the store" and "if you think you're going to turn a profit keeping backyard chickens you have been wildly misled" and so on, and so forth, and I'm so living for it.
and I can tell you right now, he did NOT like my answer of "if you're trying to feed your kids, I hear eggs are edible."
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canisalbus · 8 months ago
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✦ Freshly ordained ✦
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lazylittledragon · 2 months ago
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dndads s1 you're so special to me
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pangur-and-grim · 7 months ago
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Pangur is smart enough that she hisses when I say "Belphie", just on the off chance he's in the room
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thoodleoo · 3 months ago
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i think the key to being a successful classroom teacher is having an ordinary classroom material (eg pen, highlighter, book) but in a really and truly ridiculous size and using it regularly without comment. nothing both throws off and enchants a student of any age than more than walking up to your desk to ask you a question and pausing with baffled uncertainty as they see you grading papers with a pen so large you cannot actually hold it the way you would normally hold a writing utensil. there is a brief moment as they look at you where you are able to raise an eyebrow and go "yes?" while acting like absolutely nothing is odd about the fact that you are currently writing with a multicolor my little pony pen that is half the girth of your forearm and in that moment you hold the most power in the entire school. use it wisely
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appaeve · 10 months ago
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homesick
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chloesimaginationthings · 14 days ago
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How I assume Roxy and Chica are like in FNAF
(Original by @/nasykuching on Twitter)
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